What i found helped relieve the anxiety, if only slightly
When i was feeling my lowest and worst i was willing to try absolutely anything to help me to stop feeling how i was feeling. That is including to somehow "escape" the intrusive thoughts i was constantly having.
The first thing i done to help myself in general was to go to my doctor, now if you have read my previous posts you will know that initially i suffered with random panic attacks, anywhere, anytime. My doctor gave me Citalopram which at first i didn't take because i have a fear of taking any type of medication. However when i began having constant intrusive thoughts that would not stop day or night, i decided to give Citalopram a go.
I am pleased to say that they definitely helped me, they may not work for everyone but i am only telling you what i personally have tried and found have helped me through my journey.
The next thing i found helpful was a mindfulness colouring book, i treated myself to a nice pack of colouring pencils and my OH got me a brilliant book (i will add the link for this at the end of my post if you're interested in the one i have) i find the pictures are relaxing and nice to colour, accompanied by inspirational quotes on mindfulness. I find that whenever i am feeling even slightly anxious i can just whip out my colouring book and it takes my mind off of the way i am feeling caused by the anxiety.
I also decided to start reading. When my intrusive thoughts were gradually stopping and weren't so frequent i found that i was constantly still being scared and anxious of those thoughts returning. It still consumed me because all i could think of 24/7 was "what if they returned, what if i have an intrusive thought" and so on my mission to make my life as happy and 'disney like' as possible i took up reading. I would find the happiest little chick flick book, all about love and happiness, nothing negative or sad and most definitely it would have a happy ending! This would let my mind wander into the story where i could imagine the scenes and see the story playing out in my head, not to mention wondering what will happen on the next page! My mind wouldn't have space to be worrying as i was so engrossed in a good book. I done this during the day in my spare time and every night before bed to get my mind relaxed and ready to sleep.
Following a diary has been the best thing I've committed myself to. I've got a beautiful diary with a full page for each day where i can put in any appointments for myself or my boys, days off that my OH may have, play dates, groups, school dates etc and it has helped relieve a lot of the stress I've had especially as my eldest has started school and i am completely knew to the school mum life from drop off times/pick up/trips/lessons and homework! I live by my diary and would be lost without it!
My health visitor recommended writing in a journal, i went and picked myself a lovely little bright pink journal from Sainsbury's, perfectly timed as they had all of the school supplies out. My HV told me that whenever i had an intrusive thought or any other extreme worry that really caused me distress to pop it down in my journal. The aim is to get it down on paper, out of your head and then close the book on it. I really didn't think much of this initially and thought it wouldn't work at all, but as i said i was desperate to try anything to help myself and it did help. I've not braved reading it back yet and i don't feel that i need to right now but i'm sure it will make for an interesting read when i finally do. I found that after a while i started to write down what i had been doing each day that were positive which was amazing to go from such negative and horrible thoughts to so many happy positive things. Shortly after that i just stopped writing in it all together because i felt i didn't need to rely on writing everything down anymore.
And finally i found that Accepting help to have some 'me' time and doing more of what i love was a vital part in helping relieve some of the anxiety i harbored. I have spent so long at home taking care of the boys, the home, my OH and not really myself.
When i think back to my first pregnancy and the pressure i put on myself to recover from having SPD so that i could take care of my son like a 'normal' mum would. Having PND that i never properly dealt with, i just got on with being a mum put a brave face on and went back to working my full time job. I then started to hate my job and left meaning i was at home full time with my son instead. I think back and maybe i didn't really hate my job, i just couldn't commit fully because i felt unhappy deep down inside myself but just didn't realize it and so i felt it would be best to stay at home and take care of everything there instead.
A lot of other things along the way that have contributed, i believe, to what has happened to me recently. I'm dealing with it now, as best that i can and as i said something i am working on is accepting that i need help, i can't do this alone and as mum's, we NEED 'me' time, to do more of what we enjoy. I personally spend it baking and doing make up, hairdressing, seeing friends and spending quality time with my OH which we very rarely get.
I hope you will find my post helpful and if you'd like to share any advice or things that you've found have helped you through anything similar to what i am going through then please feel free to send me a message or leave a comment below.
I've found with a change of routine more recently it has triggered me to start feeling more anxious and having the occasional intrusive thought, although more fleeting rather than sticking, i'm finding it hard to deal with. I'm finding that i am going back to the things i have listed above to help me get through and hope that when i'm in a more set routine again it will slowly stop.
Finally, something i have not mentioned yet which is actually something else i found most helpful was to research and get as much information as i possibly could. They say knowledge is power and with all the information i have found on different types of OCD, PND and other anxiety illness' i believe it really has given me the power to fight against it. I know what i'm dealing with and how best to help myself. If i hadn't of done any research then i dread to think where i would be now as far as recovery goes, i don't think i would be doing as well as i am and so i have to keep telling myself that i have come so far and i'm doing great.
There will be odd days when we struggle but we can get through it, i have absolute faith in you that you can do it and that anyone can get the help they want if they look for it.
follow this link to purchase the colouring book i have mentioned in my post, there are plenty of others so have a good look around and see what takes your fancy.https://www.amazon.co.uk/Mindfulness-Colouring-Holly-Macdonald/dp/1849497109/ref=sr_1_14?ie=UTF8&qid=1505503372&sr=8-14&keywords=mindfulness+colouring
The first thing i done to help myself in general was to go to my doctor, now if you have read my previous posts you will know that initially i suffered with random panic attacks, anywhere, anytime. My doctor gave me Citalopram which at first i didn't take because i have a fear of taking any type of medication. However when i began having constant intrusive thoughts that would not stop day or night, i decided to give Citalopram a go.
I am pleased to say that they definitely helped me, they may not work for everyone but i am only telling you what i personally have tried and found have helped me through my journey.
The next thing i found helpful was a mindfulness colouring book, i treated myself to a nice pack of colouring pencils and my OH got me a brilliant book (i will add the link for this at the end of my post if you're interested in the one i have) i find the pictures are relaxing and nice to colour, accompanied by inspirational quotes on mindfulness. I find that whenever i am feeling even slightly anxious i can just whip out my colouring book and it takes my mind off of the way i am feeling caused by the anxiety.
I also decided to start reading. When my intrusive thoughts were gradually stopping and weren't so frequent i found that i was constantly still being scared and anxious of those thoughts returning. It still consumed me because all i could think of 24/7 was "what if they returned, what if i have an intrusive thought" and so on my mission to make my life as happy and 'disney like' as possible i took up reading. I would find the happiest little chick flick book, all about love and happiness, nothing negative or sad and most definitely it would have a happy ending! This would let my mind wander into the story where i could imagine the scenes and see the story playing out in my head, not to mention wondering what will happen on the next page! My mind wouldn't have space to be worrying as i was so engrossed in a good book. I done this during the day in my spare time and every night before bed to get my mind relaxed and ready to sleep.
Following a diary has been the best thing I've committed myself to. I've got a beautiful diary with a full page for each day where i can put in any appointments for myself or my boys, days off that my OH may have, play dates, groups, school dates etc and it has helped relieve a lot of the stress I've had especially as my eldest has started school and i am completely knew to the school mum life from drop off times/pick up/trips/lessons and homework! I live by my diary and would be lost without it!
My health visitor recommended writing in a journal, i went and picked myself a lovely little bright pink journal from Sainsbury's, perfectly timed as they had all of the school supplies out. My HV told me that whenever i had an intrusive thought or any other extreme worry that really caused me distress to pop it down in my journal. The aim is to get it down on paper, out of your head and then close the book on it. I really didn't think much of this initially and thought it wouldn't work at all, but as i said i was desperate to try anything to help myself and it did help. I've not braved reading it back yet and i don't feel that i need to right now but i'm sure it will make for an interesting read when i finally do. I found that after a while i started to write down what i had been doing each day that were positive which was amazing to go from such negative and horrible thoughts to so many happy positive things. Shortly after that i just stopped writing in it all together because i felt i didn't need to rely on writing everything down anymore.
And finally i found that Accepting help to have some 'me' time and doing more of what i love was a vital part in helping relieve some of the anxiety i harbored. I have spent so long at home taking care of the boys, the home, my OH and not really myself.
When i think back to my first pregnancy and the pressure i put on myself to recover from having SPD so that i could take care of my son like a 'normal' mum would. Having PND that i never properly dealt with, i just got on with being a mum put a brave face on and went back to working my full time job. I then started to hate my job and left meaning i was at home full time with my son instead. I think back and maybe i didn't really hate my job, i just couldn't commit fully because i felt unhappy deep down inside myself but just didn't realize it and so i felt it would be best to stay at home and take care of everything there instead.
A lot of other things along the way that have contributed, i believe, to what has happened to me recently. I'm dealing with it now, as best that i can and as i said something i am working on is accepting that i need help, i can't do this alone and as mum's, we NEED 'me' time, to do more of what we enjoy. I personally spend it baking and doing make up, hairdressing, seeing friends and spending quality time with my OH which we very rarely get.
I hope you will find my post helpful and if you'd like to share any advice or things that you've found have helped you through anything similar to what i am going through then please feel free to send me a message or leave a comment below.
I've found with a change of routine more recently it has triggered me to start feeling more anxious and having the occasional intrusive thought, although more fleeting rather than sticking, i'm finding it hard to deal with. I'm finding that i am going back to the things i have listed above to help me get through and hope that when i'm in a more set routine again it will slowly stop.
Finally, something i have not mentioned yet which is actually something else i found most helpful was to research and get as much information as i possibly could. They say knowledge is power and with all the information i have found on different types of OCD, PND and other anxiety illness' i believe it really has given me the power to fight against it. I know what i'm dealing with and how best to help myself. If i hadn't of done any research then i dread to think where i would be now as far as recovery goes, i don't think i would be doing as well as i am and so i have to keep telling myself that i have come so far and i'm doing great.
There will be odd days when we struggle but we can get through it, i have absolute faith in you that you can do it and that anyone can get the help they want if they look for it.
follow this link to purchase the colouring book i have mentioned in my post, there are plenty of others so have a good look around and see what takes your fancy.https://www.amazon.co.uk/Mindfulness-Colouring-Holly-Macdonald/dp/1849497109/ref=sr_1_14?ie=UTF8&qid=1505503372&sr=8-14&keywords=mindfulness+colouring
Comments
Post a Comment